If I Disappear Will You Look For Me? lyrics

Some days I feel like I'm slowly fading out Like a voice you hear but never really hear I smile, I speak, I stay around But inside I'm already not here I learned how to exist without taking space How to be quiet, easy, small I mastered the art of being needed But never the art of being held at all I watch you live like I'm a detail Like I'm a line you could erase And it scares me how invisible I am Standing right in front of your face And in the silence after I speak There's a question I'm too afraid to say If I vanish into the dark Would you notice I'm gone away? If I disappear, will you look for me? Or will I just become a memory you keep? Will you feel the emptiness I leave behind Or will the world replace me with time? If I disappear, will you call my name? Or will my absence feel the same? I'm still here, I'm still breathing, barely free But I need to know if you'd look for me Would you look for me? In the quiet, in the night? Would you look for me? When I'm no longer in your sight? I've been drowning in rooms full of people Screaming inside without making a sound I give my heart like it's something disposable And act surprised when it's never found I keep leaving pieces of me everywhere In conversations, in beds, in songs Hoping someone will notice I'm missing Before I'm completely gone I'm tired of proving I deserve to stay Of fighting just to be seen I'm tired of feeling like a ghost In someone else's dream And when the lights go out on me And I finally stop pretending to be strong If my name becomes a whisper in your mouth Will you miss it when it's gone? If I disappear, will you look for me? Or will I just become a memory you keep? Will you feel the emptiness I leave behind Or will the world replace me with time? If I disappear, will you call my name? Or will my absence feel the same? I'm still here, I'm still breathing, barely free But I need to know if you'd look for me Would you look for me? When the days get cold and long? Would you look for me? When you realize something's wrong? I don't want to disappear, I just want to matter I don't want to be a wound you heal and forget I don't want to fade like smoke in the air Like a love you never really met So if I fall apart, please see me fall If I go silent, please hear my scream If I stop existing in front of your eyes It's not because I left, it's because I was never seen I'm not asking you to save my life I'm just asking you to stay To look for me in the dark When I can't find my own way If I disappear, will you look for me? Or will I just become a memory you keep? Will you feel the emptiness I leave behind, l Or will the world replace me with time? If I disappear, will you call my name? Or will my absence feel the same? I'm still here, I'm still breathing, barely free But I need to know if you'd look for me? Would you look for me If I disappear?